One day, around the turn of the millennium, God gazed upon His creation and thought, “let’s make a silly one,” and Rachel was born. She found herself in Greensboro, NC, with dreams of working at the best radio station on Earth, Rock 92. But accomplishing those dreams didn’t come overnight. Her hard work began as a child, when she found herself bullying all the other kids on the playground and complaining that her teachers wouldn’t give her enough homework. Some kids tried to tease Rachel for having red hair, but they soon learned that was a mistake as she made them regret being born. One of her favorite pastimes was playing the NFL video game “Madden” with her older brother, who let her play as Adrian Peterson and spam the spin move button to make Peterson appear to dance like a ballerina. As she got older, she learned to play nice and eventually sucked up to her teachers enough to let her graduate from Page High School as a pirate, where she learned how to go “arrrgh.” She went on to attend UNC Greensboro, where she procured her studies so that she could finally fulfill her dreams of working at Rock 92, playing her favorite band AC/DC for the whole Triad to enjoy. Her hobbies include drinking wine from coffee mugs, eating at gas stations, and asking people if their refrigerators are running.